[SB] Sabbath Blessing

[Molly Wolf]

English, Neon, Pink

I have a friend who says that she'd really like to get her 
instructions from the Universe in English, neon, pink. She sighs in 
resignation, knowing that the Universe doesn't do that. Her Universe 
is her word for my Higher Power, aka God in religious circles. And 
yes, instructions would be wonderful if they came in "a language 
understanded of the people" and were really, unmistakably obvious.

Indeed, I have known people who felt strongly that that's just what 
was going on for them -- who believed passionately that they were 
under direct instruction from the Almighty and had no choice but to 
obey. Problem is, for those of us onlooking, sometimes the will of 
God as a person perceives it seems to coincides a little too cutely 
with the will of the person in question. We watch as the person heads 
off in a particular direction, not so much led by God as driven by 
his or her own particular demons. That's often what spiritual 
wilfulness is about. It is a sad fact that spirituality and religion 
attract the healthy and the un-, and the un- can be pretty 
spectacularly strong-minded.

It can happen to us too -- no finger-pointing without three fingers 
pointing back, as the saying goes. I've certainly found myself 
propelled in directions that turned out to be disastrous because I 
was so convinced that God was directing me, when what was really 
propelling me was my own substantial Stuff.   Truly, truly, I am 
telling you: I speak from inside this particular phenomenon. 
(Formerly, that is; I plan on making fresh and original mistakes 
instead of repeating the same tired old ones over and over again.)

Oh, there are prophets out there, real ones -- Martin Luther King 
comes to mind, and I don't doubt that at his best, he was channelling 
something genuinely divine, as all great preachers do at times. But 
that's different than getting on your hobbyhorse and going charging 
off in the divinely appointed direction as you've perceived it, and 
expecting everyone else to fall into line behind you.

In fact, we mostly don't get English, neon, pink. Divine skywriting 
doesn't seem to happen, at least not often; we're more likely drawn 
gently, sometimes almost imperceptibly, in a particular direction 
without understanding why. It's only in retrospect that the patterns 
emerge; at the time, we're effectively clueless, only doing the best 
we can in what seems like a fog of confusion. And we beat ourselves 
up for being so unclear, because we're told by the English/pink/neon 
people that we should *know* God's will, because it's all there in 
the Bible, black and white.

Doesn't work for me. I don't know about you. Opening the Scriptures 
with my eyes closed and laying finger to verse usually ends up 
getting me something weird in Deuteronomy.

But I've come to believe that the fuzziness that often surrounds us 
may be a company of angels -- that uncertainty isn't a sign of 
unfaith, but a mark of humility and the willingness to listen very 
hard for that still small voice that shushes all the mighty winds. It 
also reminds us of the need to operate in community. It's not 
surprising that the healthiest spiritual system I've ever encountered 
relies on shared servant leadership and the consensus of group 
conscience to make decisions.

Also, it's in this effortful discernment, this trying to make sense 
of things, that we grow in compassion, wisdom, and spiritual 
strength. The journey in faith is not a sprint; it's a very, very 
long walk. But the company is excellent.

So we occupy this quiet space, in this diffused and silvery light, 
overhearing soft voices speaking wisdom in ways that we can only 
dimly grasp, knowing that the brightness and power of God's *real* 
voice direct would be far too much to bear.

"Thy will be done," was Jesus' final prayer in this life. And how can 
I know what that is, when I've already made my decision?

(For Sarah, the wise)


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A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in 
no other way. -- Mark Twain