[RivCompanions] Let's try this now

Barbi Click bgclick at gmail.com
Tue Jul 22 01:30:31 UTC 2014

Friday will have to be a travel day for us. Kids are in school by then and
it will be far too early in the school year to pull them out for a day.

I feel fairly certain I can get Sunday off but won't until I know a date
for sure. We will have to leave Sunday afternoon regardless.


On Monday, July 21, 2014, Virginia Brown <mothervirginiadb at gmail.com> wrote:

> Okay, we're trying the refreshed and restored Companions list, plus
> Associate and co-founder Donna, who contributed that excellent letter a few
> days ago.
> So far, the responses we've received about the proposed special GC meeting
> on Friday October 3 have been predominantly negative, including those who
> have indicated that they'd be able to be there for the evening, or part of
> the day.  Let's try another alternative:  What about September 19, with a
> similar schedule?
> And, since several indicated that Friday was a problem but they would be
> able to come for the weekend, which is better for you:  a weekday, a Friday
> with weekend for continuing and/or travel, or a Saturday?  A couple felt
> that we needed at least two days.  That would be wonderful, of course--but
> this wasn't on anybody's calendar, and may not work... Would this be
> workable for you, or does it make it less likely to be feasible?  Do you
> believe we will need the time, or that our conversation will expand to fit
> the time available?
> We should go ahead and schedule this, so we can all put it on our
> calendars now.  Again, we all realize we're not likely to get everybody,
> but it's very important that everyone who possibly can be present and
> participate; we have some critical decisions before us.
> Along those lines:
> This has been a shock to all of us, and each of us has been experiencing
> it in our own ways.   There have been various feelings of responsibility
> expressed, questions about whether there might have been ways of
> intervening earlier on, and so on.  At the same time, there's an awareness
> that the particular issue of marijuana use and sharing with guests, as
> great a concern as that is, especially with the lack of recognition of the
> difference between one's private property and the "sacred space" we hold in
> trust, is connected with some larger issues which have been obvious and
> worrisome for several.  We will all, I imagine, grieve the loss of Susie as
> our companion as well as in her role at the House; and some will (or have)
> started second-guessing what happened.
> We do need to understand what happened and learn from it, and right now we
> right here need to deal with the immediate fallout, to help with all the
> arrangements surrounding Susie and Abby's move, including seeing that they
> themselves have what they need and want (as is happening).  However:  *a
> real danger to us would be to get "stuck" at this point, to keep trying to
> analyze and re-analyze the events and/or our role in them (or lack
> thereof).  This is not what we need to accomplish at the proposed special
> GC!*  Instead, we will want to pray, listen, discuss, debate, and make
> some decisions about how to proceed into the future--most immediately about
> the Motherhouse property, but that will have implications for the whole
> Community.
> This past weekend I was with the Emmaus Chapter in Memphis, and greatly
> enjoyed seeing them.  Although it was not the primary topic of the retreat,
> we spent some time talking about recent events, naturally enough.  Someone
> commented wisely that *stuff like this just happens--it happens sooner or
> later to every religious community.  What counts is not that it happens,
> but how the community deals with it, whether it tries to cover it up, how
> it carries on.*   It's been important to a good many people (including
> both our Episcopal Visitor Barry and the Bishop of West Missouri Marty,
> whom I informed about all this and who approved of our action) that when it
> did happen we responded promptly and decisively.  Part of the "not covering
> it up" will be how we discuss this among ourselves:  Please, as much as
> possible, openly, charitably, with the whole group unless there's some very
> good reason otherwise.  (It will be helpful if we're all more or less on
> the same page; and already I've seen how readily information and comments
> can be misunderstood or distorted in some way, with no evil intent on
> anyone's part!)
> And meanwhile, if you do have questions about what has happened, or
> concerns, or whatever, I will be very glad to try to respond.
> It's important, too, that we respond with compassion and generosity
> regarding Susie (and Abby and Ed)--but that doesn't mean bugging Susie to
> rescind her decision to withdraw from the Community; she needs some space
> right now, I think, and she has been moving in this direction for quite a
> while.  Our best chance for continuing our valued friendship is to give her
> space, and be as non-reactive and cordial, even if she strikes out angrily
> toward oneself or another, as possible.
> A "crisis," as they say, is a "dangerous opportunity."  A prime danger is
> that the reaction to what has happened does more damage than the original
> injury (as I think happened with 9/11).  Let's not go there!--but let's do
> be open to whatever ways this may prove to be an opportunity--an
> opportunity, maybe, for Rivendell to respond to some new facet of God's
> call, and/or to recover aspects of our core.
> I've been so aware of the support of our combined prayers during this
> difficult time; please keep them up, and be sure I'm praying for you!  This
> morning in the chapel I felt as though we were, as it were, floating on
> those prayers.
> Much love to all,
> Virginia +
> PS:  This afternoon Heidi took off for a trial placement in a new home,
> with a friend who is very fond of her--a clergy spouse who is a member of a
> book club which normally meets at Rivendell.  If she can behave herself
> appropriately, this should be an ideal placement!

*Barbi Click*
*www.linkedin.com/in/barbiclick/* <http://www.linkedin.com/in/barbiclick/>
<http://feathersandfaith.blogspot.com> *
*http://facebook.com/bgclick <http://facebook.com/bgclick>*

    *“For surely I know the plans I have for you,… plans for your welfare
and not for harm, to give you a future with hope. Then when you call upon
me and come and pray to me, I will hear you. When you search for me, you
will find me; if you seek me with all your heart, I will let you find me, …
and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and
all the places where I have driven you, … and I will bring you back to the
place from which I sent you into exile." *Jeremiah 29:11-14
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